Peet'chers of Meeeester Weeeeeelyams

 (insert something witty and topical here, would you, Miss
Finch? Since no one knows that every last word I write is
actually subcontracted out, I think that you should probably
use the "laconic cowboy" writer, and not the "effete, impudent
snob" writer. If L.C. is out of town for the holidays, then use
the "impassioned idealist" guy -- what the heck's his name anyway? And when you
finish doing that, Miss Finch, we need to get these Christmas cards out. Use the
standard "love, the Williams" phony signature stamp, and not the "Mr. and Mrs." one.
I will have my cell phone, but it'll probably be on the golf cart, so if it's an emergency,
let it ring a LONG time.

Oh, and Miss Finch? Try not to have any emergencies, OK? Good girl. Oh, we're out
of Guyanan coffee as well.)

(illustration credit: Kelly Freas)

Mr. Williams captured in a frolicsome moment.

Mr. Williams captured in a not-so-frolicsome moment.


(Illustration Credit: William Rotsler)

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